Sounds like me back in the day, except for YouTube because that wasn’t a thing yet. (I did try to get some tunes down for MP3s but my old four-tracks were too crappy and once I tried to polish them up for publication, I got lost in notgoodenoughs.) I used to play in a blues band that never made it out of a buddy’s living room, then in another potential band that never even met up for a session, we’d just jam along whenever two or more of us met. Also. I’d write songs and record them - crappily, more as sketches than actual songs - to four-track for that would-be band but they never got that interested.
There are certain things I did and didn’t do that probably have an ADHD ring to them.
- Did: Practice. A lot. We’re talking whole afternoons for weeks.
- Didn’t: Practice with any sort of focus that would actually make me better at stuff. (Like, techniques. I never learned top coordinate the full amount of hands I have.)
- Didn’t: Learn actual licks or even songs. I just can’t seem to memorize lines. Also, repeating old songs bored the crap out of me, especially the popular favorites. I did manage to memorize a few chord progressions as long as I didn’t have to do anything fancy with those chords…
- Didn’t: Develop a taste or even just a tolerance for what people wanted to hear. I still cringe at campfire music. Even before I started playing, I was always the first in my class to get impatient with a new song just as it got popular and everybody else wanted to hear it, all the time. (In my experience, that’s a good trait in a musician who’s in the position of calling their own shots, but not for one trying to get into that position.)
- Did: dive deep into musician interviews, guitar magazines and all that. I’m talking whole weeks at the library when I was supposed to do research for non-musical term papers.
- Did: Pick up some basic knowledge of other instruments - I started out on harmonica, then moved to huitar and bass (mostly bass) but also picked up some keyboard and percussion.
- Did: get a feel for arranging music.
- Did: Write songs because, see above re: old songs. Not that many, though, because it used to take ages for me to actually get down and record them. Or finish the lyrics.
- Did: Record, to the point of getting the idea down.
- Didn’t: finish most of those recordings.
- Didn’t: get in a band and stick with it long enough to actually get good at it or play any of those songs. We did cut a few nice jam sessions, though.
- Didn’t: figure out how to get organized into semi-professional musicianing - you know, get a practice room, gigs, musicians who’d stick around.
- Didn’t: submit anything, anywhere.
Looking back, I think I needed the variety that writing, recording and playing several instruments brings. Also, doing my own very unique thing as opposed to developing a routine, always working on the next litle project but never on my own skills. I’m still doing that with comics, except now it’s the internet and I know how and where to publish stuff. And I got better at the skill thing by identifying better what it was that I was lacking and seeking that out.
One of the afore-mentioned buddies started playing the guitar by learning basic techniques from a book, practicing hammer-ons for ages before even learning the first chord. I couldn’t for the life of me imagine doing that. (The cautionary tale version of that would have me at a pretty good level soon but staying there while he got better and better, but that never happened. He’s completely tone-deaf.) I never would have got even as far as I got if I hadn’t had the next challenge in mind, the next thing I couldn’t quite do yet, the next thing to apply a skill to which I’d now have to acquire.