I’m 27 years old female and have been diagnosed with ADD since I was 7.
That was shortly after my parents got divorced. My father was a jerk and soon lost visitation rights so I never saw him again.
He had ADD and Bipolar, but refused to take any medications for it. He preferred alcohol.
I don’t have many memories of him since I struggled with paying attention and was constantly entertaining myself in “La-la Land”.
Yeah, I was a very oblivious kid which made me his favorite. It was also obvious that between the three of us (I have two sisters) I was most like him.
My amazing mother has always been by my side, taking me to therapist and psychiatrist, trying to understand why I think the way I do. I have always been able to look to her for help.
Recently things in our lives have been getting more stressful. My mom is getting older and I still tell her my struggles and try to explain the emotional difficulties I am having. (Note I am not the most coherent talker and do have a tendency to ramble). But I still feel compelled to talk to her about my problems.
My mom finally snapped and admitted that she just tunes me out whenever I talk to her. She told me “Go find a therapist to talk to! It’s grow up time!”
I know I should talk to a therapist. I have spent years and years going to less than helpful therapist because they took my insurance.
I have tried to find a therapist near me, online, etc. But they don’t know how to help someone without a cookie cutter issue. I have no problem talking about my personal life, I’ve been to a lot of different therapist, but I’m not stupid and I can tell when they are killing time cause they don’t understand my situation and issues.
I trusted my mom. Now I find out that the one person I have turned to my whole life is too tired to even listen to me. Ever since then I have felt so betrayed and angry. I have lashed out and now my mom refuses to listen to me because I remind her of my father.
I feel like I’m trying to climb out of a cave with no source of light and completely alone, because the one person who had a torch has walked away.
Sorry that was a bit depressing, I promise the next post will have at least one pun in it. I just can’t think of any right now