DOES IT EVER GO AWAY?

So here I am 75 yrs. old. Found out I had ADHD about 20 yrs. ago. For many years I heard that when an ADHD child matures (i.e. becomes an adult) typically (how do you quantify that?) just “grows out of it . . . [ADHD]”!

After being here with so many :brain::brain::brain::brain::brain: . . . ages 12Yrs. to “senior citizens” like me . . . I believe that “typically” ADHD and most of its “symptoms” . . . [“strengths” . . . of a different color . . .] do not go away. We learn how to “tame” some or store them away in the attic of our :brain:!

But they are still there . . .

From everything said on this forum it would seem that I am stating the obvious!

So be it . . .

What can I say . . .

I have poor impulse control :joy:!

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i think ive said it before but its not about growing out of adhd its about growing into it, some people create a life which allows them to thrive in an ebvironment that plays to the strengths of their adhd and so no longer come across as many problems, some people just get lucky and choose a career that just happens to be a good fit for adhd, many others sadly never find out just how positive having adhd can be, i guess i’m somewhere in the middle, and i think im heading in the right direction :grin:

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i wonder how much of the “growing out of it” was children who never had adhd in the first place mellowing out with age.

i think one thing that contributed to my not being diagnosed earlier (there were so many factors) was that my adhd wasn’t a huge problem in my family. i was messy (still am) but my mom just cleaned my room for me.

i think in some families, my adhd traits would’ve been an ongoing source of conflict.

on the flip side, i do think we have unrealistic expectations for most children. i remember when i was a math tutor, watching another tutor punish a 6 year old child for crawling under a desk during a 3 hour math tutoring session. i don’t think that’s atypical behavior. i think it would be atypical if a 6 year old sat still and did math for 3 hours straight after school without fidgeting.

but the response was to treat that as a deviant, unacceptable behavior.

so. yeah. this is why i wonder if the people who grow out of adhd are people who just grew out of being 6.

(if you are wondering, i used to sit on the floor with my students. also, we played flashcard basketball. and so much uno. and drew pictures. and they got to correct my “homework” and run up and down the stairs because i wasn’t going to make them sit still for 3 hours and learn to hate math.)

anyway, what was the question?

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Bravo to you! You certainly understand children . . . Better than so many of us “adults”!

:sunglasses:

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As a diagnosed ADHDer I do think that there is a lot of over diagnosis of ADHD. Oddly enough, of my five children I think one one, one of my girls, actually has an ADHD brain. I home school all of my children, specifically to avoid them being labeled because they are difficult to control in a group setting.

I don’t want my children to automatically obey authority. People in positions of authority abuse that power more often then you can know. I was a reasonably bright girl, I gravitated towards interaction with adults and had a lot of pseudo-maturity because I read ALL the books. (No, seriously, I won a summer reading program because I read every book in the juvenile section and moved into the adult fiction. Granted it was a library in a fairly small town but still… I am going to allow myself to be impressed by that.)

I have had a lot of inappropriate relationships with adults, especially in schools and starting younger than you would be comfortable thinking. Probably a good my parents pulled me in 7th grade and homeschooled from there on… except I started going to college when I was 15 and fell right back into the same patterns, just with a more elite set of adults.

Anyway… long story short (too late) I think that the ones that grow out of it are largely not ADHD to begin with just precocious and active children. And some, as stated before in this thread, grow into their ADHD but never out of it.

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Well, the older you get the more experience you have dealing with your brain. Since it’s a neurodevelopmental disorder, it doesn’t go away, but being an adult improves your chances of success because you’re more likely to be able to go to therapy, get medication, and adjust your home to fit you.

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I think it depends , the people who have the mildest form of ADHD , who may have had diagnosis, support , a wide variety of treatment may not meet the criteria for a diagnosis of ADHD as an adult .

I think 80% + of people who had ADHD as child will have ADHD, as an adult , therefore not to grow out of it .

Age 9, I was told I was a clumsy boy ( symptoms of dyspraxia). My mother was told it would get better, I had one session of physiotherapy . I should have had more sessions and support.

Age 33, I received a diagnosis of dyspraxia, based on the childhood records age 8 and 9.

I think I managed to improve slightly, it is still quite bad .

Sometimes people are over diagnosed with ADHD ( certain demographics in certain countries). However , there are demographics who are under diagnosed .

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I have asked myself that question a lot lately.

I believe it is more about being in training and mastering the technique. Growing into understanding how one works.
There is a proverb “Wer selten reitet hat schneller einen Wolf.” something like - Who rarely sits in the saddle (horseback riding) soon loses leather.-
There are times where I feel I really tackle it and than when I let go it feels overwhelming.
As for they symptoms, I have the feeling they get strong like a good wine. :slight_smile: But that might actually different according to sex. As a female woman* in the fifties I realize that hormones have quite a say in this.

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On a positive note, perhaps if the symptoms are less obvious on the outside, that means you are doing quite some effortful work to overcome and mask them or your brain has changed as a result of this struggle. I’d rather go with this version than take the credit away by saying that symptoms have improved, if they did it was through continuous effort, not merely age.

Another positive note: I have heard that medication in childhood may lead to a partial or complete normalisation of the brain structure.

I often feel as if the symptoms got worse even though they may well have improved quite a lot, but my awareness has increased as well as the awareness of the general lack of awareness and limited capacity to do anything about it, being 22 years old and in the second year on uni, I don’t really know what to expect from the future. The constantly accumulating traumas and raising anxiety and depression simply because I cannot get anything done and keep my life together are quite worrying.

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Hmmm… That’s interesting. I don’t think I’ve come across that information before. That might account for why some people “grow out of ADHD”. (Too late be l for those of us who were diagnosed well into adulthood, but if a predictable treatment can be developed like this, maybe younger generations will fare better than we did.)

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I feel this is the hope of so many things ADHD and not
but as to will it go away I can not say (being a 15 year old)
But I don’t think so

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I believe ADHD and other neurodiversity just to be a part of the makeup of humanity, and so I don’t think that I will ever go away, or that it should.

What I hope for is that there will be better ways to identify neurodiversity earlier, better ways to treat and accommodate such differences, and better ways to encourage the gifts that people with neurodivergent talents have. (And for more appreciation of those gifts.)

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Completely agree with that

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