Empathy

I have dyspraxia, ADHD and aspergers traits.

What is everyone’s perception of the word empathy ?

I did not understand , what it really meant , as a result I got a diagnosis of ADHD .

There is cognitive empathy, emotional empathy and compassionate empathy.

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Hoo-boy, this is a definite character defect of mine. I tend to go into fight or flight when unexpectedly confronted with another’s emotions. Then my impulsivity will usually have me say the worst thing because somehow my brain tells me that saying or doing the tried and true empathetic responses is trite and hackneyed. Then when rebutted about the stupid thing I said, I get defensive and emotionally dysregulated and dig that hole about a mile deeper. Then somehow I’ll turn it into an attack on me and list the wrongs of the other…:scream:🤦🏼…yeah, I’m terrible at this.

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I’m very emphatic. But I must say that I sometimes wish I wasn’t. As much as it helps with understanding someone’s feelings, it can be confusing and overwhelming too. For example: as a cashier it can be annoying. I can feel everyone’s energy and mood. And especially on crowded days it’s a lot to handle all of that. I’ve learned to close myself off of it, but then still I feel a lot. Especially people with a negative energy have an effect on me. I myself am a very positive person. So when a negative person comes along it effects me in every way. And not only that. When you’re empathetic and have a positive energy, the thing you pull towards you are people who need positive energy. So most of my friends have depression. They need someone who understands their feelings and with a positive energy. That’s me. So somehow it feels like a huge responsibility to me because I feel like I have to help everyone with this. Feeling so much isn’t always great. But it’s also amazing. For instance, it’s hard to lie to me. Depends on how good of a liar you are. But most people get a tad bit nervous when lying. I can feel that. But also, it helps you understand how someone really feels, because you can feel what they feel. It helps a lot with giving someone what they need. I’ve learned by now that for instance, if someone wants to attempt suicide, it often doesn’t make sense to just try to talk them out of it. They’re too deep for that to work. In stead you often just need to give these people love and understanding and support. Not support in their plans, but support in their needs. Giving a big hug and being there for them. And give them an opportunity to be heard. Let them do the talking. Just listen to what they have to say. That usually works the best. I can feel that most people who want to end their lives often just don’t feel loved or cared for. Or they think no one will ever listen to them. They don’t need someone to talk them out of their plans cause it won’t work. That’ll only convince them more to do it.

What is empathy to me? Idk. I have no idea. All I know is that for me I can feel what everybody else feels.

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