First of all, I want to say thank you to the excellent initiative of building this community, videos and most important the sharing of such detailed facts and behaviour about the state of being.
I’m going to try being focused on not going into many details. I guess it is an exercise for me because first all I’m French and I believe I have the soul of Molière, Victor Hugo or other writers that cannot stop their phrases or just go straight to the point without painting out a whole scene.
My story is very mixed indeed and if I come to this forum today is that I definitely would like to get involved in a community that makes me feel less lonely. I am pretty soon 40 years old and I have always known I was different, even though it is always true that every people are unique. Though 10 years ago, I was living in Portugal and for a reason I could not explain today, I was the only guy living in a summer condominium in winter. This has helped me introspect. I spent 6 months living on the beachfront listening to the huge waves crashing into the shore. I started realizing how much trouble I had and how hard it would be to continue feeling the way I was. At age 23, I got diagnosed in an emergency situation with a LED. Not to mix with the hallucinogenic stuff ha! It is about Lupus. I was actually almost dying with a severe long issue and a heart surrounded with liquid. But we are here to talk about ADHD right. So guess what? I have ADHD. I know it since Portugal. But we do have a great problem in Europe about those kinds of diagnoses. It was only last summer that I finally could integrate one of the 5 centres in France that truly specialize in ADHD. In between that time, I have been living in Sweden where of course I was trying to start to build a relationship with a woman that already had a child (I met her in Portugal) and that wanted to offer him a brother with me (or we could also say I wanted her to be the mother of my kid that simple). In Sweden, I have been living the most horrible nightmare in real life and obviously, I was not the only French that felt this way in Scandinavia. First, the temperature. Second, in Sweden, if ever you dring wine, you are an alcoholic… Second, you have to drink their horrible alcohol as a starter for the meal (vodka or else)… Third, if you are a father there, you are married to her mother and share everything financially if you haven’t declared what you want to set… Anyway, imagine, with an ADHD, a French trying to build a business in Sweden… I don’t continue the details cause you can imagine what follows. Anyway, today back to France after having tried to get diagnosed in Sweden for more than 3 years. Of course, the mother of my kid and I broke up. I now almost don’t see my son and that is the saddest part, not only for me but especially for my kid. Anyway, I got diagnosed now with ADHD and started the treatment 3 month ago (I have slept maybe one week since then lol=> It is a joke of course). But now I don’t find Cognitive Behaviour Therapy here. I don’t know what to do with myself. I kept on changing places. I’m living now close to my parents because I got a heart attack (because of 15 years of treatment for Lupus) and sometimes I feel like just ending this whole experience with just not breading again. I am not a depressed person though and I want to show my child I can make it. So… Probably why I’m here writing tonight. Hope you guys are doing fine. I’m in my bad days tonight, but I’m sure I’ll find light tomorrow (my son will spend Christmas with me so I can’t be a loser).
Thanks again for the beautiful woman that creates this Forum and her community. I really recognized myself in almost 110% of the explanations…