The past couple days have been very difficult. And as I’m learning with my ADHD… its actually been the past month or so, but the cumulative effect of not putting things away and leaving emails in my inbox has finally revealed itself in a tsunami of frustration.
I was diagnosed about a year ago. I’ve had my HUGE ups and some very low lows. Taking my medication and getting the diagnosis was incredible… but now the meds aren’t working as well. I upped my dose from 20 mg (IR - generic adderall) to 30 mg which worked for a while, but I was having a really hard time sleeping, and coming down from the medication left me a mess. At the end of the night I’d be running around trying to get things ready for work the next day and eventually crash and feel like I was going to explode. Now recently I was prescribed 25 mg XR (adderall --this time name brand) with 20 mg IR as a booster, twice a day.
At first I loved it. I felt happy, on task, clear, motivated. Then a couple days later I still felt happy, but not motivated. I just wanted to read my book or watch a movie and hyper focus on that. Work has been so hard. I’m forgetting things, time is disappearing, and now I’m getting anxious again. I haven’t felt the social anxiety my diagnosis and honestly, I forgot what it felt like! I’m starting to feel like everything is my fault again. I feel like I’m falling down rabbit hole. My days are so up and down. Last night I was in a total brain fog and was crying in bed next to my husband.
I know I need to adjust my meds but I don’t know how. I trust my psychiatrist and plan to call him and get a new script. I guess what I’m looking for is support and to hear about other’s experiences. How do you balance everything? If you go to therapy in addition to seeing the medication wizard, what is it like? Has it helped? Has anyone gone to support groups?
Thanks for reading any and all advice or words of support are appreciated.