How I'm doing.

So this is gonna be ramble because I’m rambley and complany.
Ok so I’m suddenly super anxious and overwhelmed and my head hurts and just overall bad. I dont know if it was earlier flashback (PTSD) or the trauma reminders all day to a larger extent but I’m doing terribly. I am also anxious about my autism testing in less then a week. I feel useless. I’m tired. I kinda wanna let someone else take over the body but i think I shouldnt because the stress of being here might be to much for whoever takes over. I’m thinking of doing some of my maladaptive coping mechanisms and I want to but i know i shouldnt and my jaw hurts from clenching. My reactions to things feel more fake then usual I also feel sick and more I dont remember I may also be dissociating

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Can’t really offer much in terms of suggestions beyond grounding techniques that work for you, but I wanted to stop by and at least send you encouragement and soothing vibes. :heart: I hope you feel better.

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Thank you

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And my head hurts and I wanna cry and yeah I think thia is to much PTSD reminders for a day, I’m not sure I can go back to school if this is how it is going to be.

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That sounds so rough - I’m so sorry Fox.

Definitely do what is healthiest for you. Are you able to email your therapist? I often email my therapist if I won’t be seeing her for a little while (see also: within 48 hours of the stressful/traumatic event).

Wish I could send you all the fluffy stuffed [insert favorite animal here]s! :heart:

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I could text her but I already have about other stuff and shouldnt bother her anymore

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Thanks for a fluffy stuffed animal of every animal

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Ohhh Fox I’m sorry to hear you aren’t going so good. It’s good you’re resisting doing any harmful coping stuff. And if it’s any comfort, even if things go wrong with your testing we’re still here for you! :blush:

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Only resisting because I should but I really want to and thank you (:

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No problem!

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I mean, this is literally what a therapist is for. If you text her again it’s because it’s what you literally pay her for - in a sense, that is. :heart: I definitely encourage you to text your therapist but I also understand if you can’t. :heart: You’re worthy of help and advice from not just group support (like us) but from your professional care team as well. :heart: :heart:

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Yeah I have (well she texted me) and we talked about a different thing but I should get out of the PTSD triggers area all day soon

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Gonna do poorly till then

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I’m out! Still in pain and drained but I’m out

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Glad to hear you’re at least out of the trigger zone now, Fox.:heart::blush: Hope you’ll feel better soon! And yeah, feel free to talk with us, but also ask your therapist (s?) whether they can help.:blush:

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Yeah I will thanks (two therapists and one dietitian/therapist)

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I’m just gonna complain here
(Content warning eating disorders and calorie counts)
My stupid fucking dietitian who is a great person wants to increase my meal plan and I dont fucking want to and I’d like her to shut the fuck up and stop asking me to increase what I’m eating I need to stay below my 1000 because I need to stay less then half but I need less then that and she wants me to eat so fucking much and i cant fuckig do it but I’d like to stay out of the hospital

Sorry to hear that you are struggling. Hope you are doing better soon.

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Thanks

Hey, Fox. You’ll be losing weight either way, but unless you’re doing a specific strategy, be careful as eating that low just makes it easier to gain the weight again back as soon as you eat. What we talked about, have you tried talking to them about that?:sweat_smile: Or don’t they trust you with the plan…?