I am a 28 y/o junior in college (transferred out of community college) and obtained nearly a full ride. But I have been struggling at my new school, and after some serious reflection, I came to realize that my ADHD finally “caught up” with my abilities.
Here’s the thing: I was diagnosed with “ADD” back when I was 14. I was on medication, but remember not feeling like myself. Additionally, it made me constantly tired and not willing to eat. So, I stopped taking medication.
Fast Forward: Since I was struggling, I decided to really look into ADHD, (believe or not, I really had minimal information on my own disorder). Suddenly, after being fully engrossed with all of this information, I realized that this disorder runs my life.
All the negativity, the years of depression, the rollercoaster emotions, the inability to do mundane tasks, the constant anxiety and procrastination, the inability to answer questions that I know the answer to, or just to even articulate words correctly. All the problems I had as a child, and the difficulties I had facing my strict and emotionally abusive parents. The difficulties being around my VERY big family, and feeling overwhelmed, but being chastised for not being around, ducking out early, or for isolating from the group.
All of these things that cost relationships, friendships, jobs… the things that have been dictating my life in every aspect has been because of this disorder, and I had no idea. To be honest, when I was diagnosed, so was everyone else. I assumed I was misdiagnosed for several years.
I’m very upset, feeling like my life isn’t my own.
I’m considering trying medication again, but I have to wait until I have health insurance (hopefully soon).
Hoping to find some support, similar experiences/feelings. Genuinely, trying to reach out to others who might understand me.
All the best, fellow brains