Introduction Attempt

Intros
#1

Hi, I’m Dawnslayer, I just found this place not too long ago. I just got diagnosed with ADHD-C about a month ago, and a friend recommended How to ADHD. So far the videos have been really helpful, but I’m hoping to talk to some people, uh, text to text? Or however you want to put it.

So, um, introducing myself… I have general and social anxiety, which is how I ended up in counseling, which lead to my recent diagnosis of ADHD. I have a pet hamster named Milo, and have had many pets over the years (chickens, gerbils, hamsters) and am now working at a veterinary clinic. My long-term plan is to go into the book industry as an author, designer, and translator. Which is taking longer than expected, but I’ll soon have my associate’s degree in graphic/web design. (If I can pass all my classes.) Other than procrastinating, I mostly knit, play the cello, and play with Duolingo (I swear I will figure out the Hebrew alphabet SOMEDAY). I’m a huge superhero nerd and Marvel fan (although DC does have some good content, too). Squirrel Girl, Gwenpool, Spider-Man, and the Winter Soldier are my favorites.

Right now I’m trying to focus my energy on work, college, and writing. And figuring out how to work with my brain instead of fighting against it constantly (and ending up exhausted as a result). So here’s to hoping that things go well (national novel writing month is coming up for us writers, after all) and that I come out the other side the better for it. Oh before I forget, it’s nice to meet you all.

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#2

Hi dawnslayer cool name.
nice to meet you and welcome :slightly_smiling_face:
can i ask what the C in adhd-c means? i don’t remember seeing it before but then again maybe i just forgot :grin:

I love animals too, i used towork in a safari park actually.

good luck with your writing, I see a lot of great writers on here, so maybe you can make some good connections on here and help eachother out.

I was diagnosed only one year ago and my life has been improving ever since, the main thing i have learnt is that although having adhd can be tough, there are so many positives that make up for it, if only you take the time to understand why we behave the way we do, and often things which first appear as a negative, with a small change of perspective and an increased understanding, turn into something very positive, you jusy have to find out how to use your adhd, just like those marvel characters with their superpowers :+1:t3:

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#3

Welcome to the HowToADHD forums @Dawnslayer ! (That sounds like it could be a good superhero name. :woman_superhero:)

@Samuelburns - I’m pretty certain that the ‘C’ ADHD-C means it’s the Combined presentation. (I’ve seen ADHD-I, ADHD-PI and ADHD-IN used for the Predominantly Inattentive presentation, and ADHD-H or ADHD-HI for the Predominantly Hyperactive-Impulsive presentation.)

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#4

Welcome Dawnslayer!

Lots of people here to share stories, experiences and ideas with.

I was recently diagnosed as well, and its explains so much about my behavior. I have spent a lot of time these last two months analyzing everything to change my life and behaviors that are more ADHD friendly.

As you learn about ADHD and you identify the things you may have been struggling with, you too may want to make adjustments as well.

If you have any questions, ask away! :slight_smile:

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#5

Nice to meet you too . . . :sunglasses:

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#6

Thanks!
The C stands for “combined.”

Oh, that sounds cool! I’ve never been to a safari park but it sounds like an interesting work experience.

It’s one of my favorite usernames so far.

One thing I am having trouble with is paying attention to conversations I’m not interested in. Do you have any tips for that kind of thing? People can apparently notice when I’m zoning out. :grimacing:

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#7

I sometimes have a problem with this. The way I pay attention when I’m not interested in the conversation is by being interested in the person. Then, no matter that the conversation topic, I can find a way to be interested.

  • I have a long work history in customer service, so I have lots of practice with this. It really helps if there is some question to answer, problem to solve, or story to listen to. (I don’t do as well with small talk. If I’m talking with a stranger to me, I look for something in common.)
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#8

I try to pay attention in such circumstances, but even if I am able to be attentive and listen carefully my short term memory comes into play. Then I have a spotty recollection of what the other person said. I think it is because of this difficulty with the short term memory, combined with poor impulse control, that I will frequently interrupt the other person and insert my thoughts . . . Which certainly, often annoys the other person. Another reason I do this, based on my own wacky theory . . . Is that it is easier for me to remember what I create in my own mind and then say . . . then it is to remember what the other person is talking about.

:dizzy_face:‍:dizzy:

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#9

Unfortunately I don’t think so. I do the same thing, and there are times when I zone out for a few seconds or more, usually because something else more exciting grabbed my attention, or something the person said triggered my own brain to start thinking about something.

I can usually deal with short (1min) bursts of others talking about things I am disinterested in, but if they go on and on, I usually lose interest, but I think I try to remain engaged and at the end I just hope they aren’t expecting a response. I am guessing at the end I will just shrug, nod or give a vague response like “I understand, I agree, or I don’t know, I’m not sure”. I can’t think of specific examples of this offhand, so I will try to be more aware if it comes up again.

I am bad at listening to stories I am not interested in, and feel bad because I know when I tell stories they are much longer than they should be. Small talk can also be tough as I don’t really keep up with current events or trends, so having common interests for me is very important…

ME! ME! I am trying hard to be better at this. Sometimes I mistake pauses in a conversation as somebody being finished, and because I have ants in my pants to speak my piece, I often get caught interrupting, but when they continue I back off and apologize.

Oh, and now I am going to have to go check out the IT Crowd… I have heard of it before, but never really looked into watching it. In the IT field for over 25 years, so I am sure I will get a good laugh out of it :slight_smile:

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#10

That’s definitely good advice.

I interrupt somewhat frequently myself (yet another reason why I love texting) and I know it drives people crazy. I’m trying to work on it, but if I spend all my energy on not interrupting… well, I get bored and want to go back to whatever I was doing prior to the conversation.

I can’t count the number of times I’ve done this. I genuinely think they finished but then they say I interrupted them and oops. :grimacing: Didn’t mean to.

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#11

Interrupting the speaker, or taking a turn to speak when they leave a break in what they’re saying, is a natural thing to do… even neurotypical people do this.

What you can do is be sure that your interruptions or interjections are on the topic the person was talking about. It takes self-discipline to do so.

One simple thing to do, as taught by former FBI negotiator Chris Voss, would be to repeat the last few words the other person just said. (I’m still working on doing this.) This let’s the other person know that you ARE paying attention, that you’re (at least a little) interested in what they’re talking about, and that what you’re saying is a response to them.

At my first regular IT job, when I started in the career field at an IT Help Desk a little over 10 years ago, we would watch the first episode of “The IT Crowd” on the first day of training (as a break between training sessions, to help the new hires relax a bit).

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