Kiddo is leaving

This isn’t ADHD related except in how I respond… sorry…
I’m a foster dad. Our first (and so far only) placement has been with use since jan 30th of last year. That was his 1st birthday.
Sunday he leaves to go to his bio fam. It looked like right up until the last week or so that the bio’s were going to lose parental rights, and we might be able to adopt.
I’m struggling hard with still bonding and being close to him. I know I need to. I know why. It’s just really hard right now.
Thats… about what I got for now. At work. I just needed to share. Not even sure if I am going to come back to this post. I dunno. It’s all just… hard.

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Sorry to hear that…:cold_sweat: Don’t really know what to say…

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Could you ask to be able to see the kid?

I’m sorry that’s happened, it does sound really hard and I hope everything works out all right :pensive:

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This must be really difficult. And the weird part is that the better to do your job as a foster parent, the more painful it is when they leave. He’s really young, he needs to be loved. So you didn’t hold back and you did right by him, and now this is what the next bit feels like, with added rollercoaster because of getting your hopes up.

I hope it helps to know that the pain is because you did right. And if this wasn’t painful you probably weren’t doing it right.

You will come through this. I wish you strength to deal with it all. Can you give him a little photo album of what he did in this last year and a half?

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I’m so sorry that this is happening to you. I hope you do post again. This isn’t something to deal with alone.

This whole experience must be heartbreaking for you. I’m sorry.

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Hey all.
Its been about two weeks.
I thought I was doing ok for about a week, but Sunday I slept in, took my meds late, which meant I was wake late, and I have a cough that has been keeping me up, so I had 3 hours of sleep. Monday Mondayed pretty hard, and …
God I miss my son. There was about 10 times I almost started crying at work in front of interns, coworkers, etc… and I just… am drained.
Work has been crazy out the wazzoo. There is so much going on and I am so tired and this on top just… is rough.
This morning I took the chance to be the weak one while my wife was the strong one, and I cried in the car while she took me to work.
Last night I was watching Babylon 5. Season 2, episode… 2? 3? Dunno. New captain is being introduced to the viewers. He is a widower, and we learn more about it as his sister visits to get him to live a life outside of his work. And John goes off on how he can’t face it because so much reminds him of Anna, he will think “I need to tell her this next time I see her,” or “I turn to say something to her and for a split second I realize she isn’t there but I don’t remember WHY.”
And I go home and I open the door and I don’t hear “Daddy! Daddy’s home! Mom, Daddy’s home!” and… I forget why. And it hurts.
I know it will be ok. I know time will heal. And due to some things that happened, and my faith, I believe he is in a good home now.
I just want him in mine.
Love hurts.
And thats ok.
It’s something I am learning.
JTH.

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You are unbelievably strong for going through something like this. Go ahead and cry! even though what happened was for the best, it still hurts. and that’s ok. You changed his life for the better, and he changed yours. So hold on to the memories and breathe you can get through this even though it’s rough. We’re here for you :pensive::heart::heart::heart:

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