New but Not New.

Hey there! Again…

I was active a little over 6 months ago as Wabbajack and then deserted the forum. And now I’m back. But I didn’t like my old username so I deleted my old account and created this new one.

So, yah. I have no idea what the turnover rate is like and if the same users are active or not so I guess I’ll reintroduce myself.

I’m a 30 year old electrician from VA who has been married for almost 6 years. Was diagnosed with Adult ADHD roughly 6 months ago which caused so much of my problem behavior to make sense. I have General Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder and am borderline Autism Spectrum Disorder.

Currently I’m trying to schedule a full comprehensive diagnostic test to try to figure out once and for all what sorts of mental disabilities I have.

I take Vyvanse 20mg and it works ok-ish. I was up to 30mg and thought more would be better but my obsessive negative ruminations increased to the point where I was stimming constantly and was acting out.

So yeah, I’m back to try to figure out how to be a better husband and also to see if anyone else deals with obsessive ruminations and how you cope or control them.

So yeah, uh ‘hi’.

P.S. I also have an obsession with anthropomorphic animals.

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Well, uh. Funny story. I didn’t realize I could change my username.

I didn’t actually delete the account. I couldn’t find a way to do that, so I removed all the permissions and changed the email to my burner account and then hit ‘log out of all devices’. So that’s the closest I got.

Hey Wabbajax, welcome back!

What sort of ‘obsessive (negative) ruminations’ do you mean?
Do you mean like constantly thinking negative things about yourself?
Or more an OCD sort of thing like “I’m a bad person because I think bad things”?

Also, I’m curious about what sort of Autism Spectrum symptoms you experience, do you mind sharing something about that?
Anxiety vs Autism is bit of a personal interest topic, it’s something that I’m currently battling and I’d love to hear your story.

Good luck on getting further diagnosies, it sounds like a really good step.

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Hey, welcome back!

I’m fairly new myself, and if the username doesn’t tip you off, I like owls to the point that in some online communities, I’m called Owl. I mean, what else can you expect from three owls in a person suit? :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:

I’ve been previously diagnosed (and medicated) for depression and anxiety and am on my way to being assessed for ADHD. Also, been married since August, long distance (I’m Canadian, he’s Australian) but we’ll be closing the gap in hopefully the next year or so.

This is my first and hopefully only marriage.

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Sorry for the delayed response, I thought this site was dead.

When I say I’m dealing with obsessive ruminations I mean that my mind constantly seeks out problems to solve, but because I am at work, there is no way for me to solve the problems that come up. So instead my mind just turns them over and over until I start to feel hopeless. The last time this happened it was a fixation on all the times I’ve let my spouse down over our marriage.

As far as Autism Spectrum symptoms go I’m still uncertain just how much is actually due to ADHD (and possibly being a Highly Sensitive Person?). The main things are that I have an aversion to conflict, I have difficulty maintaining eye contact especially if I’m in trouble, I self-soothe through stimming by bouncing my leg, and when I’m extremely agitated I begin to display symptoms similar to a “rumble stage” prior to an autistic meltdown. I begin pacing back and forth, vocally repeat phrases out loud compulsively, make odd stress-induced gestures with my arms and hands, and in extreme cases I will bang my head against an object.

I took an assessment that I was given by my therapist just as an informal tool to check for ASD and the results were inconclusive. So I’m not officially on the spectrum, I just have borderline tendencies that could be exhibited by someone on the spectrum. Mostly this is due to the fact that I don’t display many of the negative effects of autism such as impaired social development. Which leads me to suspect that maybe I’m just a Highly Sensitive Person with ADHD.

I don’t really know. I’ve been searching for answers for awhile and have been coming up empty.

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Hello kaetheowl!

Good luck on your marriage! I was long-distance dating for the majority of my pre-marriage life but even then, that was just between states. Not entire countries!

I wish you all the best on making it work!

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