Please give me a quarter.

I don’t know whether this will make sense because everything is too overwhelming right now.
I am a med school student struggling with ADHD. It’s just too much stress being in med student, due to the pressure from my family I joined this course and even though I’m not interested in it I somehow want to be a good psychiatrist and help people.
But I don’t think I can ever achieve this. Today I had an exam for which I read the wrong portions(I didnt see the timetable properly, I read for the next exam). Even though the questions asked were familiar I failed to write it bcoz I forgot many basic points. I couldn’t give out my half completed answers, so I just striked out all my answers. Now I’m just a failure. After a very long time my suicidal thoughts are back. I can never meet my parents expectation. I just disappoint everyone. I can’t even maintain a proper relationship or a friendship. No one understands me. There are people who care about me but they don’t understand me, they just criticize me.
I just need a quarter. :sob:
I just need someone to understand and support me through my struggles.
I was someone who talked about the way I feel, someone who talked about my hyperfixations a lot but after many criticizing and bullying I stopped talking about my emotions. Now I just know how to be excited or angry.
I’m exhausted.

2 Likes

Hey there @Adhdkid I’m sorry to hear you’ve been struggling with that. I want to start by saying that failing doesnt make you a failure, grades dont reflect who you are as a person! You’re not alone, being constantly ripped between extreme emotions is hard for anyone but especially for people like us. I’m sorry that your family isn’t supportive, but the tribe is here for you :heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart: ( and don’t worry, your post made perfect sense :wink: )
What’s your hyperfocus?

4 Likes

Novels and comics. :slight_smile: They always put a smile on my face. Sometimes I use it to distract myself from the emotional turmoil.
What about you?

2 Likes

Cool! What’s your favorite?

Umm I guess musicals? Of fun facts!! I could spend all day searching up random things ( did you know the most common cause of death for bees is wing exhaustion? )

2 Likes

A bad exam and not meeting your familys expectations does not make you a failure. Do not give up, but maybe consider that it is you that is going to live with your occupation for many years. Not your family. So if you have options, consider something that is fulfilling, not exhausting.

1 Like

Never knew that. Lol
There is no favorites, my preference changes from time to time. :sweat_smile:

1 Like

Haha yeah I get the same feeling :sunglasses:

1 Like

You will be fine, I’ve been a teacher for many years and I’m not perfect, but know how to live with ADHD

2 Likes