Social Connection, not Social Distancing

I was on the way to work today and listening to the recent episode of ‘ADHD reWired’ and Eric made a comment that really struck me. He said that there’s so much talk right now about “social distancing” when really we should be calling it “physical distancing.” Now more than ever it’s important for us to find ways to stay connected, even if we can’t see each other or spend time with people who matter.

So, what are you all doing to stay socially connected during this outbreak?

Any tips or tricks for people to help fight the feelings of isolation and stay socially connected?

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For me keeping in contact with people has always been a struggle, it’s not that I don’t like talking to my family it’s partly that I constantly forget to text or call people back and partly the fact for some reason I dread telephone calls etc I don’t really know why but since being in self isolation I’ve discovered video calling ( I know I’m a bit late on the technology) but actually I really enjoy the fact you can see who your talking to and I’ve been so much better at staying in touch especially with my mum, so anyone who has the same hatred of telephone calls give it a try, you might be surprised like I was as to how much fun it is.

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I’m also horrible about remembering to text people. Especially if they’re also not people who spontaneously take the lead. In the past it’s been easy for me to let friendships wither due to being so forgetful and not attentive. I try to make a conscious effort to be better, but I can still go weeks or a months without messaging someone.

I like the idea of video calls. I’m also very averse to talking on the phone. In part it’s what I do a lot at work, so I don’t like having to do it at home. But it’s also awkward sometimes and you don’t know when to talk or not talk and sometimes step all over each other. I’m very much an introvert, so there are also times when I just want to not people.

I used to use things like Facebook to keep in touch but haven’t for a couple of years. I also used to be more active on Twitter but have fallen off of that. I’m thinking it may be time to get more active either via phone/text or some other social outlet online.

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I really like the distinction you make. Ironically, when I woke up this morning, I was thinking that we could have a page here that encourages us to sort of “check in” with other . . . daily! You know, sort of like people do when they come down for breakfast and see their significant other for the first time after awakening.

When I was in the army, the first thing in the morning (everyone) was to “Fall In!” Once in “formation” one by one each individual responded vocally and loudly when their name was called. Keeping the group cohesive and knowing that everyone was there was vital for the survival of the group. It happened every morning, and at other times whenever necessary.

I am not saying this as a political statement, but just to point out that group cohesion and support for the individuals in a group are vital . . .

And we certainly are a “GROUP” . . . a very special, important and supportive one at that . . .

So this morning I feel the support of you all . . . And thought I heard my name just now . . . “YO” :mega: . . .

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Socializing was a struggle for me before this started. When I can’t think of something to say to anyone and I’m in a funk, I prime myself by going and looking for a question to answer, online or in my discord groups, then sharing information. Alternatively, I start by asking people in my circles about things I know they are interested in or currently doing. If I’ve got nothing to talk about, someone I know usually does.

Collaborative projects are my main way of staying in touch. I am currently writing a tabletop campaign with one of my friends, and messing around with a 3d printer for the other. Another group I’m in has a bunch of encouragement for getting exercise without the gym- they’re trying to recreate the experience by chatting with each other on voice while doing exercise at their usual meetup time.

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I’ve been struggling to respond to text and whatnot as well. A good majority of my friends dislike video calls so that’s not exactly an option either…
A tip that works for me ( at least temporarily ) is going outside. It doesn’t fix the problem but at least I feel better :joy:
@Brooklyn I was also thinking of a check in/chat type thread! I just wasn’t sure if others would be interested :sweat_smile:
EDIT: I made one, there’s also a thread on accountability

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Do you do online DnD or what is your tabletop game? Do you stream it?

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I don’t stream, never occurred to me to try and I’m not sure my players would be comfortable with it. My sessions are mostly IRL in small group gatherings, but we hybridize it online with discord. We did switch to remote play during quarantine, however. We get on a voice channel and if we need a map I make it in Roll20 (paid service and a bit of a learning curve mind you). (in theory on the Roll20 mostly I fart around with it and don’t get the map all the way finished and we end up with pics of my crappy drawings on a physical map lol)

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Just realized you asked me what game, which I take to mean what system. I ran a 5e game for a while, but my group wanted more customization than that system allows so we switched to Pathfinder. Pathfinder is what I learned on. My science fiction game (featuring time travel) works on GURPS because it’s the only system that’ll let me work in everything from feudal Japan warriors to cyberpunk modified humans.

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:raised_back_of_hand:also quick to avoid and forget or “put off until I deem managable” any texts , call or emails. Being in an education profession however I’ve been working to reply regularly.

I think the hardest thing about when COVID hit, was I liked having a break from constantly being around people, but I lost all sense of any little routine I had. I never really had accountability prior to COVID, but now I do with others I work with.

To keep up with other friends from university we do google meets and zoom, and I use duo with family.

Physical distancing can be trying, but I find the hardest is already being on virtual calls regularly for school and doing dopamine detoxes afterward as it’s really draining, so I do quite enjoy quiet moments, but video calls are my go to!

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Yup, same! It doesn’t help that I always wait for my friends to reach out first ( which is unlikely as they’re going through a similar thing )

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