When I grew up I had a very mentally ill and unstable mom and a multi disabled dad. I had to move quite a distance from my hometown to be able to transition from the scars from being without diagnosis and with the aftermath of growing up. It feels today like I’ve recovered from growing up in a cult (all mental abusive behavior of my mom and the closed unit we were is of the same sort of cocktail one who has left a cult).
Yes I’ve come very far. I’m certain that ADHD and Asperger’s is tainted with some PTSD and I’m having Body Focused Repetitive Behaviors.
Now when my dad is dead and my mom is acting like I am made out of thin air. She doesn’t know that she is ill and anyone who argue is shunned.
I’m still struggling with being able to set boundaries and knowing whenever it is ok to feel all the bad feelings. And I freeze whenever I end up in a conflict. Now on to the question. How does one know when anger, sadness and frustration (amongst other feelings) is ok, on what level to show it and how? As an adult living in Sweden I know nothing about what is right and wrong in this matter and how to not freeze, I need to remember what was said and how, now I don’t.
The aftermath of getting a diagnosis is without a doubt getting to know the answer to this matter.