Thoughts on Self-Love

In true ADHD fashion, I went down a rabbit hole just a little while ago

A mention by @lui of Martin Seligman (the psychologist who is credited for developing Positive Psychology), led me to look up the famed researcher.
Google informed me that he founded the first Masters of Positive Psychology program at U. Penn.
I looked up the info about that program on the school’s website, and saw a listing of Capstone Projects.
One project caught my eye, titled “Love’s Liberation: The Science of Whole Self-Love”, and I read the abstract description.

In it, I read the following statement:

  • “Some view self-love as a beneficial and necessary component to self-actualization, well-being and loving others. However, many in the scientific community associate self-love with narcissism and selfishness.”

MY THOUGHTS:
When I think of LOVE and of self-love, I don’t think of the self-seeking behavior of “narcissism and selfishness” as any form of love. I think that this distinction ought to be made by using a different term.

I do think that “self-preference” describes such tendencies adequately well. It seems a good general, and neutral, descriptor. Though I think we can all demonstrate self-preference in our daily lives without seeming narcissistic or truly selfish. (Babies exhibit self-preference as a normal behavior, but I would describe their motivation as closer to self-love than to narcissism.)

Just had to share my thoughts…

4 Likes

@j_d_aengus
I’m going to watch the season finale of Hawkeye.
Absolutely not playing a Jedi mind trick subtly raises hand and waves

I’m now boarding the proverbial plane and using my favorite application “Airplane Mode”

Good night and good luck

1 Like

Since you will see this the next day, I hope your show was good! (I haven’t even started Hawkeye yet.)

@j_d_aengus
ooo and that scene and then that it happened
and the other thing happened. Wow
The end! Worth it so worth it.

If I could “ eternal sunshine for an endless mind” for movies my first wipe would be movies by made John Hughes.
And the classic cartoon “Lady and the Tramp” just makes me happy watching it.

1 Like

I agree, I would call the other self-absorbance. I think that being excessively focused on oneself is a common sin in our society, but even in the sense of being focused on one’s flaws. I think that even to do something selflessly you need to love and accept yourself first, you need to be good at receiving if you want to be good at giving, so the energy could flow through you.

1 Like

That’s a great perspective on this topic. I can definitely see how self-love is essential in order to act selflessly. Otherwise, the motivation would be to please or appease others (relying on others’ determination of one’s worth, instead of having one’s own feelings of self worth).

1 Like