Trying to Remember Past Conversations...

I was wondering if anyone’s learnt any helpful tricks for how to remember past conversations with people?

I ran into a few very awkward situations yesterday as I was in an event where I met a couple of friends of friends who I had met before many months ago (and actually a couple of years ago with the other person!).
They both remembered a lot about me, they remembered my name and even details like what I do for work and other little bits of information I had told about myself the last time we met… So they could ask nice thoughtful questions like “how’s that situation now that you talked about last time” etc. But my memories of them were so vague it was really embarrassing that I had no idea what to talk to them about. “And how’s your… umm…” I couldn’t remember what either of them does for work or what the f*** we had talked about the last time I saw them… I knew their faces and remembered how I felt about them the first time we met, but any actual details of what we talked about…? How could anyone remember that??

It happens with friends too sometimes, and I feel like sometimes I have to have the same conversation with someone multiple times before it actually goes into my long-term memory… It’s so frustrating and makes me afraid my friends think I don’t care, if I forget which company they’re working for at the moment or something. :confused: But it’s just that I literally forget… I’m interested, but the information won’t stay in my head long enough to remember these things the next time I see someone…

I know this is something that probably a lot of people here struggle with. So if anyone’s learnt any tricks that help them remember this stuff, let me know! :slight_smile: (Other than secretly recording every conversation I have lol :joy::joy:)


I don’t really have any tricks. I usually find for me I just have to be up front and honest with people about my poor memory. I usually set the stage when they start talking or when we first meet. It’s still not great because I wish I could remember more detail but I just can’t make myself hold on to information most of the time.

Sometimes I’ll try to recap the conversation after it’s over, and tie it to something from the conversation. Like, what were they wearing, or what did I do after. I don’t have any mental tricks that work overall, though. In rare cases I’ve written down information to try to help it stick in my memory. I also use Google Docs for some things so I can pull it up on my phone before I meet with someone if it’s really important.

One thing too is to add it in my calendar if I know when I’ll see someone next. “Ask them about…” and it will prompt me.


I like the idea of adding some questions in the calendar!! :slight_smile: I think that would work well for me, I’ll try it out.


I’ve found repeating facts in my mind can help but more effective is writing down things ASAP even mid-conversation if required. It helps as @quietlylost mentioned to recap the conversation and add in facts that might not seem important. In fact @quietlylost pretty much covered everything I’d suggest lol.