What to do when your done trying.......


#1

Sooooo…

It's been a long time coming.....

What do you do when your sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I’m to the point of forfeiting. I try I fail and I try again…and fail over and over. To the point that I will not try. why start when I know the outcome before I even begin. This has been increasingly getting worse I can feel the weight crushing me. I’ve been slipping into doing things I know I shouldn’t do just to feel ok and having trouble getting my thoughts under control. I don’t know what else there is I can do. I’m at a brick wall that I can’t climb.

Thank you for being the only place I can be free and open. Quite literally been a life saver.thank you to all


#2

Something that is helpful to realize that life still goes on. You may be done trying but there are others who want to try to help you see that trying isn’t as hard as it seems. Find those people. I’m sure they are out there. What I do when I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired is I do something that always pulls me into hyper focus. For me it is reading. When I read I’m in the story and don’t think about anything else. It is almost like a pull away from reality and helps me cope.


#3

Besides here i really don’t have anyone. I’m so depressed that I don’t have much interest in anything.
The extent of hyper focus I have is reading through this forum and news. I’ve tried reading…to damn hyper for that lol. I barely get thru the intro before I put it down lol. Same for TV and movies just can’t do it. I do tons of research on adhd and it’s effects on life but that’s about it. I sit in my garage alone or hours just trying to avoid life.


#4

Sorry you’re feeling so bad, where are you from? Maybe there would be someone here who would like to meet up, also online gaming is a good way of making new friends.


#5

I’m from Ocala Florida (about an hour from Orlando).
I’ve never played any games online lol. I love gaming was a big gamer as a kid up into my early twentys.then got married to someone who doesn’t let me have freedom or fun. Now I might play Xbox 3 maybe 4 times a year lol…( Not really lol) reading back over that is kinda sad. Thank you for the advise I do need to make friends besides this forum I have 1 true friend but he moved to PA so yeah…


#6

Dude… hugs, man.
I’m sorry you’re in this place.
Depression is a stone cold bitch, and it sounds (reading between the lines) that maybe addiction (to seek stimulation?) is a part of this too?
I don’t have any answers, at least none that are not trite. I know that when I was there I ended up getting through it…
I couldn’t fix it. I couldn’t change it. I had to endure it. After the first go around in my adult life, I had that “aha” moment… It passes. It sucks, it takes time, there are small moments of joy I can have in that time before it crashes down again, and it feels like the life has been sucked out of everything… but it passes.
The next time I had that come into my life, I knew… It’s gonna suck. I’ll be miserable. I won’t care. My health will decline.
Until it passes.
Two years… and it passed.
Now my wife and I know more about what is going on, that I deal with ADHD, that emotional dis-regulation is thing, etc.
And when it comes through again, I now she is going to stand by me until it once again passes.

My dad gets it every fall. Not sure why. He gets grumpy and bitchy until about Christmas. But it passes.

I know it doesn’t feel like it. I know it’s probably been a loooong time you’ve been in this. But it is going to pass. I guarantee it. It may take meds, therapy, time, and a lot of work, but hold on to the hope that it will pass.

Also… @Samuelburns mentioned games…
If you are a PC Gamer, and can spare 20 bucks… May I recommend Kingdom: Two Crowns? It’s available on Steam (hit me up, I’m Hushai.) and it has a Co-op mode. Simple controls, side scrolling management/strategy, I like it. A bit buggy, but hotfixes are inbound. (Any one else wanna add me, feel free. Just DM me your handle.)
Maybe finding someone who can just chill with you as we lose ourselves into a simple game will help settle some stuff inside?


#7

I am in a similar situation. In this pass year it feels like I lost everything. I know for a fact it helps to have friends and people who understand though. I used to have friends but over the years I shut my self off and I know that had a huge impact on my quality of life in general. A mindset that really improve my mood was babysteps. The idea of really tiny actions having huge ripples in the future. Like just the fact that you’re learning now and making friends in this forum small things encouraging interacting you’re helping others and making big ripples. reading your post helped me in a way too.


#8

I appreciate it, yeah I’m back to smoking and slight self harm. I know it’s wrong but few things actually release the anger and frustration I’ve bottled up. I’ve been waiting for that “aha” moment for along time.
I actually don’t own a computer but I will look into it after I find another job.
Thank you I appreciate you sharing your struggles.


#9

Thank you I’m glad you found your way here.


#10

Martial arts are a good way of dealing with anger, initially just punching and kicking things helps release anger but longer term study helps to not get angry in the first place, you have to find a good teacher though, I’d suggest a more traditional school for the latter rather than the modern sports teaching.
Unfortunately I injured my back at work and had to stop, but now I’m healthy again but I’m just struggling to get the motervation to do it again, even though I enjoy it and I know it helps, but that’s ADHD for you, I can feel the benefits wearing off, and I’m not as calm as when I was practicing, so I need to get back to it soon myself.
Traditional Karate I would recommend or if your not into the combative side then tai qi, or if you have the time and money then both work well together.


#11

Help someone else and everything will feel better.


#12

Always, I enjoy helping others it takes my mind away from my own bs.


#13

Im feeling a bit the same at the mo so can relate, its super draining to keep picking yourself and trying again and again when like you say you know most likely the outcome, i find in my mind i think well if i dont want to keep trying then i have to give up, but i don’t believe in anything after death so then i think well you only get one shot at life so might as well keep trucking until i figure a new plan or fait brings something my way, but it does get fucking frustrating.


#14

man, i was there for like three years. couldn’t get a job and butting my head against a brick wall.
but one day. the wall cracked. and i kept working at it. and i busted through. you gotta keep plugging at it even though it is the absolute last thing you want to do. At least make an effort, some days that is all you can manage, but at least you can say you tried just a little.

Hopefully one day your wall will crack too and you can see the light on the other side.